- Girlfriend: You hang up first
- Boyfriend: No, you
- Girlfriend: No, *soulja boy voice* YOUUUUUU
- Boyfriend: *hangs up*
i wish i had my own apartment so i could make food at two in the morning and dance around in my underwear
funny how once you get your own apartment this is actually exactly what happens
And then you cry over the responsibility of living on your own.
Stop looking at the past and all the things you can’t change. They’re done and over with. Now is the time for you to look to the future, grasp it by the hand, and decide where you want to go.
— Lacey Weatherford, Chasing Nikki (via simply-quotes)
Even though we weren’t together, you still broke my heart. Fucking asshole.
— (via flawless-hbu)
I just hope that one day—preferably when we’re both blind drunk—we can talk about it.
— J. D. Salinger (via aukles)
"youre old enough to make appointments yourself now"
There were no friendship classes. No sex classes. No classes on how to navigate a bureaucracy, build an organization, raise money, create a database, buy a house, love a child, spot a scam, talk someone out of suicide, or figure out what was important to me. Not knowing how to do these things is what messes people up in life, not whether they know algebra or can analyze literature.
— William Upski Wimsatt (via untitled7)
- white people: im not racist i have a black iPhone